a compilation of complete ruckus.

Monday, March 20, 2006


alright. i work at a bakery in orem utah, with a bunch of crazy people.

there's the kid that just hit puberty and last week revealed the fact that he had never met a homosexual. i let him know that i not only had met hundreds, but was related to several in addition. he was BLOWN AWAY that i had actually found homosexuals in Utah, as if it was more impossible than a meteor striking us down in the middle of that very conversation.

the next is my "crew manager", who is pretty much a jerk. everything is the worst thing you could have ever done. running out of paper in the credit card machine is the worst thing you can ever do. being too frantic about getting an order out is absolutely uncalled for. and you never, EVER ask to go the restroom. now THAT. that is unhuman.

but nothing beats bob. bob is the manager of the entire franchise. everyone knows the story of his life. he was raised by the typical disfunctional american family, but lived at his best friend's house who was italian. he believes he has a cure for everything. the cure for world hunger("everyone throws away enough food to feed the entire world, and then some), the cure for sadness("you CHOOSE to be sad"), and the cure for every other problem anyone could come across. forget scriptures, bob has got the answer. last week he let me know that if any one were to come in the store with a sword, he is amazing with a machette, and could chop him to pieces. usually people bring guns to scare with, but apparently in the baking business, the sword is the choice weapon. he believes no one has real passion, everyone is faking it. in a word, he's my work. he explains the craziness. aaaaaaaaaaaah!


At 9:07 AM, Blogger Greedy Kristian said...

How freakin' awesome would it be if a man robbed your bakery with a machette?!? He could even slice the loaves for you while you are cleaning out the cash register for him...just make sure you have enough register tape when you clean it out...because that would be the worst thing ever, if you couldn't track that transaction.


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